It is a new year and time for a personal assessment. How did I do last year? What resolutions, if any for 2010? I started this blog two years ago, and so far, it is provided an outlet for the inside of my experience. I’ve written political opinions, personal insights, and creative scribbles. My readership is flat most of the time, but I still love the process.
2009 was a successful year. I am more comfortable in my own skin and easily (sans negativity) recognize possible improvements. I’ve a tendency to work on too many things at once and use petty tasks to hide from the fruition of my ideas. My creativity races in a dozen directions at once, which slows forward momentum on any single task. My physical shape is fair, not great. Five years ago, I ran 15 miles a week, practiced Ti Chi daily, and lifted weights twice a week. The move west and plantar fasciitis closeted my regimen. I use sucralose instead of sugar, but am still addicted to sweet snacks. I eat more fresh fruits and veggies, but too much processed protein. I am awkward at friendship. I don’t form significant connections with peers or mates.
In 2010, I am only making a few resolutions. Most resolutions are forgotten within the first quarter of a new year, and the rest result in a personal distaste of oneself, even regret, in the following year. I think the trick may be not to look at personal improvement as a list of tasks on a timetable. Life is much more complicated, even incomprehensible at best. The most we can hope for is self-acceptance with a goal to do better.
Perfection is opinion, a fantasy, a chimera of assumptions based on communal experiences that vary as much as DNA. Dependent on the senses, red is not the same red to each, a C note does not evoke the same emotion in each, and sweet potato pie taste like yams to some or pumpkin to others. A rich life is wholly imperfect, like digits on a number line, infinite complexity lies between what we see and understand. Although we intuitively conceptualize and compartmentalize experience, we get it wrong as much as right; our understanding at best is just estimation.
Truth, Einstein said, is independent of point of view. The jewel in the scientific method is it always attempts to correct and redefine itself, but observation is always limited to our ability to experience it.
I am a life-long student observer and not a professional. I don’t pretend to have answers or even that I’m asking the right questions. However, I refuse to cower in the dark or behind a wall of materialism.
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”
Socrates (469 BC – 399 BC), in Plato, Dialogues, Apology
My short resolution list for 2010 and beyond is as follows.
1. Get in shape. It’s a life goal.
2. Less meat, more fresh food.
3. Consume less. I’ll write more on this at a later date.
4. Focus on one project at a time, one project at a time.
5. Develop life long friendships.