Red Room: Transitions

          Change is the only constant. Enlightenment is the only goal. The latter being ever choosing to learn and understand more about oneself, existence, and ones place in existence. As a human being living today, change is the only thing that is absolutely knowable. Anyone who does not recognize this is doomed to stand in the same spot until buried and consumed. I studied mathematics to earn a B.S. and the only absolute equations are so by definition. The further I traveled the fuzzier an absolute description of the world became; definition is more about the tolerances at the edges or parameters than about actual meaning. I learned that the smaller the tolerances become the closer to absolute, and if variations are small enough they are equivalent to discrete definition. They can never be absolute.

          I embrace change, but the older I get my focus is more on what is actually most important to change. Yes I always want to do better and be better, but I can change my lifestyle and habits as easily as changing socks. They are physical manifestations of me, not actually me. It is a pleasant and gratifying hobby, but I am not so sure it leads to any substantial knowledge or understanding. It can lead to an understanding about oneself, but I doubt that it applies to us as a group.

          I am no longer sure that absolute enlightenment is applicable, possible, or even desirable. Enlightenment is a great goal, and worth chasing, but do not delude yourself; the point is the pursuit and not the attainment. Fashion, language, arts trends are merely intersections or agreements on our conformity. Changing my point of view, or keeping my opinions and beliefs open to new possibilities, creating change in oneself or piling up a wave of change in the culture are much more difficult. It is a true challenge to stay engaged in ones life and culture, and not be overcome with negativity or cynicism.

          It occurs to me that everyone has a choice in outlook, and the choice you make colors all of your decisions and actions, your beliefs and politics, your ambitions and values. Many sources input the subtle characteristics of your point of view, and it is ever growing, solidifying, and changing. I am not sure why, but the dark side is an easier path, so its appeal is somewhat greater. I don’t mean evil in the metaphysical sense; it is more difficult to maintain ones authenticity, integrity, honesty, and fidelity over the small period of one’s life. Entropy, apathy, and self-destruction are the consequences of negativity. It is an easier path than to risk failure from a positive change.

          In this difficult time of wide unemployment and dissatisfaction, and although I am at the front and center, I refuse, absolutely, to choose the dark side, negativity and cynicism. Instead, I am reinforcing my belief in the pursuit of enlightenment. It is as easy as a most cliché metaphor. The glass is either half empty or half full. Half empty and you wonder if you will ever drink again. Half full and you can’t wait to enjoy the remainder.